Could a sign be a sign? I am the first to believe in a sign, but I’m not sure about this. Recently, when a date shared his birthdate, I said “I seem to date a lot of Cancers!” The look on his face reminded me to never use “a lot” in reference to dating, especially in front of a date. I have a pretty good understanding of my signs, (Aries sun, Leo moon, Libra rising), but not enough of all the others to look for a partner with a certain sign or avoid a potential partner with another sign.
But seriously, almost every guy I have dated recently, or just gone on a date with, seems to be a Cancer. Coincidence? I don’t know. They are known to be loyal, intuitive, nurturing. Sounds amazing, right? Or, maybe it’s just confirmation bias, where I am forgetting all of the other signs I hear and just remembering these particular conversations. Back in the day, I saw signs everywhere and they meant exactly what I wanted them to mean. Seeing a crush’s initials on a license plate, was a sign from the universe that we were meant to be. Whenever I saw 9:16, it would take me back to the magical night of September 16th, and I just knew it was because “he” was thinking about me or “we” were meant to be. I absolutely love that version of me that read into everything. And I absolutely love that I no longer do that. One of the best things I saw on social media said something to the effect of “I’m pretty sure the guy who watches your Instagram stories, but never returns your texts, isn’t your soul mate.” That landed. Years of bread-crumbing, settling for so little, extrapolating any good and letting it carry so much weight. All only realized through the lens of growth and reflection.
There was someone that I had connected with online awhile ago. He was out of town, and by the time we were going to meet, I had already met someone else and wanted to see if that had any potential. When that crashed and burned, I circled back and (to my credit), asked if he wanted to meet for coffee. Coffee! To his credit, he responded immediately and enthusiastically, and said he was out of town but could do dinner next weekend. Dinner. We talked and texted throughout the week. He made a big effort to find a restaurant that neither one of us had ever been to, which was not easy, and therefor, not in or near either of our neighborhoods. Because of the week of communication and the location of the restaurant, it felt safe enough and made sense for him to pick me up. When will I learn? It wasn’t that I was nervous, it just created a more awkward situation when he showed up and I immediately knew he wasn’t my guy.
Note to Self: all of these signs were for me. They didn’t mean that “he” was the one.
I think everyone knows differently. I only know how I know, and I just know. Full-bodied no. And this night, I just knew. Shoot. We walked to his jeep and I saw a bunch of rubber ducks on the dashboard. Back to signs, as an Aries, I am very direct. I asked, “why do you have toys on your dashboard?” He replied, “it’s a jeep thing.” I asked, “why is it a jeep thing?” He replied, “I don’t know. People just give me ducks. And I give people ducks.” That was my something new I learned that day. His CarPlay was hooked up and Crack The Shutters by Snow Patrol came on. Without exception, Snow Patrol is my favorite band in the entire world. They literally write the lyrics to my soul. And that is exactly what I will tell them one day when we meet.
For half of a split second, I wondered if this could be my guy BECAUSE of Snow Patrol. I have met very few men who have heard of the band, much less actually know and listen to one of their lesser known songs. But because I really and finally know who I am, and am committed to holding out for what I know exists, I quickly instead started wondering if this guy could possibly be a fun concert buddy. As the date progressed, it became pretty clear that while we may share incredible taste in music, our paths were only meant to cross for dinner. BTW, he was a Cancer. My newest theory on that is maybe it’s just that time of year. Summer is coming up and a lot of date conversations touch on summer travel. And a lot of times, travel involves a birthday celebration. Maybe the only sign there is that, as a kid, it would have been hard to have a summer birthday, but as an adult, it must be pretty cool. XO
